Awaken the Genie Within

The Common Denominator

I was watching a comedian on TV who told a joke that gave me the opportunity to relate it to personal growth and awareness. I'll give you the general idea of the joke just to make the point. It won't be verbatim and I do hope this doesn't offend anyone.

After a comment he made about soldiers and sex, a woman in the audience yelled out, "I've slept with over 39 army men and they were all a waste of my time! They were all terrible!" He paused for a moment and then said, "Did it ever occur to you that you were the only common denominator in all those situations?"

In high school I had a girlfriend who had difficulty keeping friendships. She could be a little rough around the edges and eventually, I, too, chose to walk away. Knowing what I know now, she was not able to see herself as the common denominator.

Obviously not all relationships are right for everyone. But, when we find ourselves alone over and over again, perhaps we need to pause and reflect.

Obviously not all jobs are right for everyone. But, when we find ourselves unhappy in each job or being fired or quitting over and over again, perhaps we need to pause and reflect.

Obviously not all books, CD's or seminars are right for everyone. But, when we find ourselves wanting to create personal change, and keep banging up against the same wall that stops us from creating that change, while others, studying the same concepts are able to create the change they're seeking, perhaps we need to pause and reflect.

It's critical that we be willing to look inside with an honest set of eyes and ask, "What is it I'm not doing or allowing in, that keeps me from experiencing the changes I'm wanting to experience, since I seem to be the common denominator here?"

Ahhh, Clutter

I've been feeling a little out of sorts lately with my work. It seemed every time I walked into my office I felt uninspired and had to push myself to complete even the simplest tasks. As I shuffled through some papers looking for something specific, it became crystal clear what was creating my discomfort - clutter. My desk had become a pile of papers and I had reminder Post-it notes taped in various places. This doesn't make for a free flowing, creative space - at least not for me.

I'm usually very organized and every now and then this clutter issue can rear its ugly head. In my moment of clarity I stopped all work and did a major clean up. It took all of 45 minutes and by the time I was done I felt like a cloud had been lifted.

If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times - clutter can stop the creative juices from flowing. It can bring on stress without knowing what's causing the stress. It can create limitation in your life and clutter can cause strain in relationships.

When my office was clutter free, once again, I was able to easily sit down and start working on the book I'm in the process of writing. Prior to that, I found myself staring at a blank page day after day for a couple of weeks.

So, if you've got clutter in a certain area of your home, how might that clutter be stopping the flow of something into your life? I invite you to take action to cleaning up the space as soon as possible. If you need help letting go of stuff, bring in a friend or family member who's good at getting rid of stuff and organizing. And, if you want to take it a step further - feel free to email me or post on the blog when you've cleaned up the clutter, how it feels and what, if any, physical results it brought!

As Human as Everyone Else

I was exchanging several emails with one of my wonderful, long time ezine and blog subscribers. In her final email to me, she stated something that inspired me to write this particular blog.

After thanking me for some insight I shared with her, she also mentioned how much she appreciated the fact that I share my personal life so freely - referring to my post, It's All an Opportunity. http://awakenthegenie.blogs.com/genie/2007/06/its_all_an_oppo.html

At the end of the email she wrote, "It's good to know you're human, too!"

When I read that, I chuckled to myself. Of course I'm human! I'm as human as everyone else and never want to be thought of as anything else. I have fears. I get angry. My Gremlin can get a hold of me like nothing else from time to time. I allow my feelings to get hurt. I can be as stubborn as the next person and the more I think I know, the more I realize I don't know. Okay, that's enough human admission for one blog.

I love sharing my personal experiences for the simple fact that I want you to know that I'm no different than you are. We're all connected. We all have our struggles and doing the best we can in any given moment. It's through our willingness to share our experiences that bring us together so we don't feel so alone in the world.

If sharing my experiences and lessons helps shift someone else's perspective with their personal struggles, then everything I've been through has been more than worth it. My pain, frustration, confusion, whatever it is in the moment, becomes a gift in my life that keeps on giving!

So from one human to another, I thank you for showing up here week after week and allowing me to be in your life.

Stepping Off the Family Treadmill

Do you ever find yourself dreading spending time with certain relatives? Hoping and praying that they will surprise you with a new and improved personality? Have you thought, "Maybe, just maybe, this time will be different."

Unfortunately, all the hoping and praying isn't going to do the job and chances are the patterns you've experienced in the past will just keep repeating themselves. When you expect something different from your relatives and there is no change, your Gremlin can have you revisiting the story about what's wrong with them and why you have the problems you have in your life. In spite of this story, the truth is, they are who they are and that's who'll they'll be until they aren't. And another truth is - as hard as it may be to hear - they really are doing the best they know how because it's the only way they know how to be. It's really that simple.

In order to experience a more pleasant and peaceful visit, you have to choose to step off the family treadmill and be different first. This means you visit with no expectations about any relative you have difficulty with. And unless they have chosen to do some personal work on themselves as you have, chances are, you'll be facing the same person you've been facing your entire life.

So if you honestly want a different relationship, then tag, you're it. It always starts with you. It may take a few visits to see any significant change or there may be no change at all from them. Which ever way it goes, the most important thing to remember is this; when you feel good about your behavior, and your buttons don't get pushed in spite of their behavior, you just stepped off the family treadmill and stopped giving away your power to another person.

How do you pull it off? Practice. Lots and lots of practice.

 

It's All an Opportunity

Last week my son left  for a 7-month trip to do humanitarian volunteer work in three different countries. The day before his departure we were immersed in a heart to heart discussion that induced tears for both of us. The tears weren't because we were feeling melancholy and rehashing found memories. There was some tension between us and it needed to be cleared up.

As he spoke freely and honestly, I found myself getting defensive. As I spoke my truth, he made a few attempts to leave the room but thought better and always stopped himself. Fifteen minutes into the discussion a little voice inside said, "It's all an opportunity." Within seconds, I got it! My energy shifted, which allowed the discussion to move from impatience, blame and anger to love, compassion, understanding and growth.

Everything that happens in your life, no matter what it is, is an opportunity for you to learn something about yourself. Whether it be the stories you tell yourself, the pain you try to hide through your defenses, the choice to play the role of victim or just the opportunity to feel emotions you may not like experiencing.

The more you stand in acceptance with what's happening in the moment, the sooner you get to experience the opportunity being delivered. And the more you embrace the opportunity, the more you expand your view of the world and the role you play in it.

As for my son and me? Our discussion allowed our relationship to move to a new level and the love between us deepened.

Writing Your Own Script

As I stood in line at the bank I overheard two customers talking while they sat at a bank employees desk. The conversation revolved around business and employees. Good employees vs. slackers. Young vs. old. The conversation was fairly standard until I heard one customer say to the other, "Yeah, well he's got it made, he can still write his own life's script." Referring to the young bank employee behind the desk. Then he went on to say, "You and I are stuck. Our script is already written for us and we've just got to deal with the script as is."

Wow! It was in that moment that standard became intriguing and I was anxious to hear the response from the other customer. "Yeah, I know what you mean. We've just got to get through so we can make it to our retirement." Double wow! By now my eavesdropping was on high alert. Unfortunately, it was short lived. I was called to the next open bank teller.

I don't know about you, but I refuse to buy into the belief that I can only write my life's script for a certain length of time. If you think you can't change part of your life's script or rewrite it completely because you're a certain age, I beg you to think again. Colonel Sanders started KFC at the age of 66. Ronald Reagan was 69 when he became President of the United States. Not to mention that he was an actor for 28 years before politics! I started a completely new career at age 42.

If you've got a life script that you're feeling locked into, get out a pencil and paper and start rewriting. Don't bother using a pen - you want to make sure you can easily erase what no longer suits you and replace it with something that does.

The Layaway Plan

I love talking to people about their dreams and listening to them get excited as they share the details. However, there's one common theme that keeps showing up lately and it drove me to write this short blog - the layaway plan.

This is the plan where you put your dreams into storage intending to pick them up at a later date because you just can't afford to go for it now - emotionally, spiritually or financially. It's the plan that has you keeping everything in a "safe" place until you feel like you're reeeeally prepared to take action.

You know what? At some point you've just got to take some kind of action. No matter how small or insignificant that action may seem to you. Because the truth is, there is no action that's too small. It all counts toward moving your forward and helping you become prepared along the way. When dreams are put on layaway, it's too easy to forget about them letting life drive you instead of you driving your life.

So go check out what you've put on layaway and discover what small action you can take toward reaching your dreams. Oh, one more thing. Your Gremlin is the gatekeeper of your layaway plan, so you'll need to deal with him or her as you go to take the stuff out of layaway. Revisit your 5 tips to quiet the gremlin and if you don't have it, download it here: www.awakenthegeniewithin.com