Awaken the Genie Within

Self-love and Caramel

I'm reading Sonia Choquette's new book, The Answer Is Simple...Love yourself, Live Your Spirit. There is  a story from one of her clients that she writes about and because it's such a perfect example of the work I do with many of my clients around relationships, I thought I'd share the passage for you to read and hopefully gain some insight from.

    A dear client traveled with her aunt to a small town in Iowa to buy candy made at a local convent by nuns who were famous for their confections. Shortly after loading up on their famed caramels, my client took a bite, savored the flavor, and turned to her aunt with lighthearted exuberance and said, "I really enjoy this caramel. And I'm so grateful that I'm able to savor such sweetness in life."
    To which her aunt sharply retorted, "You should be grateful, young lady, because goodness knows, you don't deserve such sweetness or anything else God gives you."
    ...They returned home and parted ways. My client laughed off the remark and didn't give it another thought. Six months later she received a surprise package in the mail: It was a box of caramels from the monastery sent by her aunt. In it was a note that read: "You so enjoyed these caramels that I wanted to send you some more. Just knowing they are sweetening your day sweetens mine.

This is such a beautiful example of someone who has chosen to remember that the words that were flung at her didn't represent her truth. She had enough self-love and awareness to not let someone else's opinion ruin her experience. And because of her conviction, her vibration was held at such a high level that it ultimately made a positive impact on her aunt.

If you're going to be happy in life, you must continue striving toward self-love. Without it, those external forces will always be in control. Why not take a few minutes and write down all the ways you can love yourself better and then put them into practice on a regular basis.

Not Seeing The Answer That's Right In Front of Us

A couple of days ago I relearned a valuable lesson - as long as our emotional energy is not centered and we're in a state of stress, it's almost impossible to see the answer even when it's right in front of us.

Attempting to create something in a Word Doc that I had done once before, I found myself being unsuccessful over and over again. Finally I decided to search inside the Help menu. But the longer I searched without finding an answer, the more frustrated I became because I knew I found the answer there in the past. And, I knew I typed in the same words to get that answer.

During this process I kept ignoring that little voice I know so well, my Genie Within, who said, "Leave it. Come back later. You're waaaay too stressed over this. Don't worry about a deadline. One day extra won't matter."

However, there was another voice, that pesky Gremlin who kept saying, "You must get this done! They're expecting it today!" That was the voice I chose to listen to in the moment and what a mistake it was. The more I tried to reach my desired result the worse things got until the only thing that was going to get me to stop actually happened. The program crashed and any work I had completed was now gone  - it was no where to be found and I finally caved in to that gentle and unwavering voice in the background who said, "It's now time to walk away. Tomorrow will be better. Let this all go." And I did.

The next day, feeling calm and refreshed, I sat down at my computer to find two pleasant surprises. First, the document that I thought had vanished was right there on my desktop with the work I had already completed still in tact. With my emotional energy in a peaceful place I went back into the Help menu searching for the answer I wanted the day before and sure enough, right in front of me, was exactly what I needed to know. Within 2 minutes I finished the entire document as opposed to struggling for a couple of hours the day prior.

This is just a reminder that when you're stressed, frustrated, being held hostage by your Gremlin and off kilter emotionally, it's critical to step back and take a different approach. Because when you don't, you won't be able see the answer that's right in front of you and life continues to be difficult.

Lessons From Michael Phelps

I don't know about you, but I've been having so much fun watching the Olympics - especially the one person who has captured the hearts of millions - Michael Phelps. He has been such an inspiration and a prime example that anything is possible when you put your heart and soul into a dream and work for it.

There was an article in the Washington Post about Phelps and a quote from him. Here's a small piece of that article that is full of great insight.

"If you dream as big as you can dream, anything is possible," Phelps said. I saw so many quotes saying it's impossible to duplicate it. It won't happen. It just shows you that really, anything can happen."

Now, when Phelps speaks, it will be about his place in history, not his pursuit of it. He has repeatedly reminded questioners that he never mentioned Spitz's record until he was asked about it. That quality, seeing the trees rather than the forest, has allowed Phelps to move through his program this week as an assembly line worker, monotonously dealing only with what's before him. After Saturday, he has swum 16 times, somehow managing not to have one dip detract from another.

"I just like best that he's handled each race individually as its own little challenge," said his coach, Bob Bowman.

Any one of us who has a dream needs to remember to focus on the trees instead of the forest and just deal with what's in front of us at the moment. It's true - sometimes what needs to be done to move us down our path can be monotonous and leave us feeling like we're making little forward movement, but nothing could be further from the truth. All the forward movements matter. Even if you don't get the result you hoped for each time, you're still gaining momentum.

If you want something bad enough you need to work at it. You need to be consistent. You need to be true to yourself. No matter what that something is, it's a part of you or you wouldn't be striving for it. And as long as it's a part of you then it deserves only your very best.

Seeing the Final Product

I can already see the final product and I'm loving every minute of it - Elise

Those words were tattooed on a young woman's arm who I was talking to recently - her name is Rebecca. When I asked her why she put them there her reason brought tears to my eyes. It was the last words her best friend, Elise, said to her just before she died. Rebecca's friend wasn't talking about what she was seeing for herself as she was making her transition, she was talking about her belief in Rebecca achieving her dreams.

Rebecca shared with me that Elise was the one person who always believed in her - even more than Rebecca believed in herself. Elise was always able to see more for Rebecca than Rebecca could see for herself and she never stopped encouraging her along the way.

That experience changed Rebecca's life and she made sure she would remind herself of those words every single day. The tattoo became a tribute to Elise and a reminder for Rebecca to go after her dreams enjoying every minute along the way.

Any one of us would be blessed to have an Elise in our life - someone who has so much belief in us that he or she already sees us living our dream full out and is enjoying it as much as we would.

And even without those words spoken from someone else to you, there's no reason you can't make them your own and be your biggest fan - after all, you spend more time with yourself than anyone else.