While attending a small dinner party at a girlfriend's house I was faced with something that actually surprised me. One of the women I met that evening brought up all sorts of emotion in me - and I'm not talking about the happy, peaceful kind. I'm talking about the kind that makes my heart contract instead of expand. Quite honestly it took all my power to not let my evening be consumed by her, so I didn't miss out on all the other people I was enjoying so much.
As the evening went on something occurred to me - she was a perfect mirror showing me my past behaviors that I have worked so hard to transform and realized that some of those behaviors I am still working on transforming. Now, I'd like to tell you, that once I realized this, I found myself in a state of peace with her and my heart expanded tenfold, but that would be a lie.
You see, although I realized she was being a perfect mirror for me in the moment, I still wanted to strangle her at times. Yes, I'm obviously a work in progress and I know I always will be.
It's been a few days since meeting this woman and I have put my energy into being grateful for her revealing more of me to myself. I continue to open my heart toward her but more importantly toward myself - allowing me to continue to work on and transform that part of me that lingers within so I may move into greater love each and every day.
It's so much easier to make other person the bad guy. But when we find ourselves reacting really strongly to someone's behavior and allow it to consume us for hours, days, weeks or longer, I promise you, it's always something in us that we haven't transformed or come to peace with yet.
Hey, thank you for sharing this, we learn a lot from people is what i make out from this post.
Posted by: innotek 5100 | November 21, 2009 at 11:54 PM
There are two dogs fighting in each of us. One good dog and one evil dog. They fight all the time. The dog that wins is the one that is fed the most. Thanks for reminding us to "feed our good dog" so the good dog always wins.
Posted by: Feed Your Good Dog | August 12, 2009 at 05:34 PM