I recently emailed a colleague a question about getting in touch with someone for some information. The response I got from her was a possibility in the back of my mind and although I was a wee bit disappointed I understood her position.
What had me laughing out loud, though, was what she put at the end of her email - Queen of Candor. You see, she was quite matter of fact, direct, and honest - everything I love when communicating with someone. Being the Queen of Candor is something she can be proud of in my humble opinion because people always know where they stand with her - there's no wondering or second guessing.
Since the majority of my coaching practice is working with people on all kinds of relationships, I have seen time and time again how difficult it is for people to be the Queen of Candor. There is a great deal of fear around speaking the truth because of their concern how the other person is going to react or not wanting to hurt someone's feelings. Eventually, though, if the relationship is going to move forward or an issue be resolved, the truth must be spoken - straightforward, no more dancing around.
Speaking matter of factly and directly can be done calmly and with grace when your intention is to work things out for the highest good of all concerned. In all the years I've been coaching people on their relationship issues, there has never been a time, after supporting them to speak candidly, that the overall result wasn't for the better.
I can't stress to you enough, the more you practice being the Queen (or King!) of Candor the easier it gets and your relationships will be better off for it - personal and business. And, yes, sometimes that means some relationships will come to a close.
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Speaking of being straightforward - with the holidays not so slowly creeping up on us why not get yourself or a loved one a wonderful gift that gives the courage and know how to become the Queen of Candor and so much more! It's my book! Awaken The Genie Within
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